I didn't discover RSD in a textbook.
I lived it for decades before I had a name for it.
I spent nearly 25 years as a physical therapist — trained to read the body, understand nervous system patterns, and help people move through pain toward something better. What I didn't fully understand for most of that time was that the same nervous system patterns I was treating in my patients were running my own emotional life.
The oversized reactions. The self-doubt that arrived instantly after feedback. The way a shift in someone's tone could send me into an internal spiral that lasted for hours. I was capable, thoughtful, and deeply committed to doing good work — and I was exhausted by the gap between what I knew and what I felt.
I wrote a full memoir about this journey. Not as a credential, but because writing it was part of how I mapped the pattern clearly enough to change it. The manuscript documents what RSD actually feels like from the inside — across childhood, relationships, a 25-year clinical career, and a major life transition — and what it took to begin building something different.
Over the last three years I've trained in NeuroChange Solutions under Dr. Joe Dispenza — a neuroscience-grounded methodology that works at the level of identity and nervous system patterning, not just behavior. Combined with my clinical background, this gives me a framework that goes deeper than coping strategies.
I'm not here to tell you that you need to be fixed. I'm here because I understand exactly how it feels to be self-aware, high-functioning, and still controlled by a pattern you can see but can't quite stop — and I know what it takes to start actually changing it.